“It’s also helpful to realize that this very body
that we have,
that’s sitting right here right now,
with its aches and it pleasures,
is exactly what we need to be fully human,
fully awake, fully alive.”
I’m a big fan of the word Remarkable.
It means worthy of notice and attention… worthy of being extraordinary and uncommon.
Is that how you’d define yourself right now?
Before I went through my own dramatic transformation, there wasn’t a chance I’d ever use any of those words to describe myself.
When I was at my emptiest, I pretty much stopped taking care of myself.
I barely had the energy to feed myself, let alone eat healthy.
A deep sadness set in, and with it came petty fights with those I most cared about.
Nobody knew it, because – like women everywhere – I’d gotten really good at still wearing a smile even while I was breaking down inside.
It took a long, long time to get there.
But I eventually discovered I was missing the core element on which all lasting change is built: Internal worth.
I came to understand that any self-improvement I made would eventually fall by the wayside,
because at the time,
I was focused only on external improvement.
What I needed to do was recognize my own core value and worth first.
Because external improvements will never last if you don’t first acknowledge your own self-worth.
If you’re making the changes because the outside world says you should…
then any change you make is temporary.
It helps to know you’re not alone.
Because since my own transformation, I’ve spoken with countless women who aren’t aware of their own worth.
Writing this blog has allowed me to meet some amazing women with incredibly sad stories who have no idea how remarkable they really are.
But the thing that has helped me the most was being able to connect to my spirit.
BY doing that, I was finally, at long last, able to release the emotional and energetic traumas that contributed to my sadness in the first place.
The first step in reclaiming my worthiness was figuring out a way to make myself my own priority.
That’s what I recommend you do if you’re interested in long-term, deeply satisfying change:
Make yourself your top priority.
I have made a list of seven ways that I have found that remind, or help me to do this on a consistent basis.
7 Ways to Make Yourself Your Top Priority:
- Acknowledge that only you can decide what you want in life – and ignore all the outside messages, whether they stem from the media or from your closest friends
- Take 10 minutes out of every day to do something for yourself. Take a hot bath or a short walk, or dive into that book you’ve been wanting to read for ages.
- Surround yourself with beauty. The more goodness you feel around you, the worthier you’ll feel. So schedule an outing with a friend who makes you laugh, or buy a beautiful painting to hang on your wall, or allow yourself to savor a sumptuous dessert.
- The next time someone asks you to do something and you hesitate, listen to the message from your inner self. It’s okay to say “no.”
- Write a sentence of gratitude every day that celebrates something about your physical body. Example: I’m grateful for my big blue eyes. I’m grateful for the crinkling in the skin around my eyes that shows I’ve laughed a lot through the years.
- Say what you feel. Value your own feelings by acknowledging them. If you can express yourself honestly, you’ll be better equipped to make wise decisions instead of being pressured into things you don’t really want to do.
- Speak mindfully to yourself. It’s easy to make cutting judgments about yourself, but that’s a far cry from self-awareness. Instead, choose goal-oriented statements when talking to yourself. So instead of tearing yourself down for not getting to the gym, say, “I deserve to exercise my body and look forward to feeling great as a result.”
The second step I took was in acknowledging that something needed to change, and it needed to start with me.
Let’s admit it – you can’t have it all and really learn to love your body and be proud of who you are if you continue doing the same things you’ve been doing.
That meant I had to stop worrying about how I looked and what others thought of me.
I had to get over my constant need for external validation.
Because the truth of the matter is, you’ll never develop true internal worth if you stay focused on external validation.
True transformation is both
The truth is we never rise above our self-image, at least not for long.
And if we ever do, our mind cannot handle our success and we quickly revert back to the way we were before.
This is how we create cycles like Yo-yo dieting.