Let’s be honest, EVERYONE wants to find someone special.
Every single person alive really wants to be able to share their life with someone that they love, honor and respect.
It is definitely the road less traveled, but so worthwhile in the end.
Jeff has asked me to marry
and I said YES!
Tip#1: Get re-acquainted
Have an honest conversation with yourself about your past relationships and your feelings toward love.
Know what type of persons attract you and why.
Are they naughty or nice?
Do make you think twice, is your gut screaming “NO” as loud as it can?
LISTEN TO THAT VOICE!
For me, I had to accept the fact that I felt an instant attraction for men who needed to be rescued.
And it is just NOT possible to have a healthy relationship with a person who is not themselves…healthy!
Learning your patterns and behaviors within relationships is of vital importance.
You must recognize the part you played.
Then ground yourself in reality.
You will then be able to use this awareness when stepping forward into the unknown.
(and trust me, the dating world is the GREAT UNknown.)
If you fail at this 1st step, I can guarantee that you will fall into the same old patterns.
You will continue to make the same old choices.
And you will reap the same old results.
That’s why awareness is key. This time, it will be different.
Tip #2 Elevate the Space
Drama no more!
That will be your new mantra, meditation, or positive self-talk.
Get rid of all the dirty laundry (aka exes) that is no longer serving you.
Make the phone call.
Have the final conversation.
Accept your part of the responsibility.
Get the closure you need.
Honor your past relationship.
Now, close your eyes, take three deep breaths, figuratively catapult them from your space, open your eyes, and move forward.
I will never forget the day I did this with my ex.
He came to our house for my youngest’s 4th birthday. He took me aside and told me he had made a big mistake. He professed his love. He apologized and said things to me, that when I was his wife, I really NEEDED to hear, but he was never willing to say…
So what did I do?
I told him that he was NEVER allowed to speak to me like he just did. I informed him that our marriage was over. That I would never again give him the chance to abuse me or our kids again.
I stated very clearly how I felt.
Looking back, I can see clearly that having that conversation that day was the ticket to my Emotional Freedom from him.
So, please don’t underestimate the importance of tip #2.
Before we can move onward to bigger and better pastures, we must take responsibility, forgive old trespassers, forgive ourselves, and do some crazy authentic work in order to forget prior mistakes.
Your intention to clear the space needs to be solid.
Tip #3: Ask for What You Want
Be confident in your choices.
Share with the world, your friends and family.
Now, visualize this person walking toward you when you wake up, when you are brushing your teeth after lunch, and when you lay down to sleep.
I developed a personal ritual that I did every single night. When I would kneel down for my evening prayers, I would ask God to watch over and protect my beloved, wherever he was, and what ever he was doing. I asked God to help him prepare for the day we would meet.
I did this every night for 6 yrs.
And guess what…Ask and you shall receive.
Tip #4: Make the decision to Put Yourself Out There.
You must put yourself out there as much as possible, whether physically or virtually.
So many women suffer from the “WOMAN IN THE TOWER” syndrome.
They sit at home, and WAIT for prince charming to magically show up and knock on their door and announce that he had been searching for her his whole life…
If you are serious about finding love, you have to actively go out in the world and seek it.
Do your shopping at the time most single men will be getting off work and stopping to grab a microwave meal. Flirt with them when you see them.
Practice making eye contact and saying hello to EVERYONE!
This will open up your energy and increase your attractiveness.
Set up a really great online profile.
Get professional pictures taken.
Survey your friends, family, and co-workers.
Ask them what your strong traits are, and what they think are your great qualities.
Then use that information to create your online profile.
Dating is not easy.
but my advice is to go out there and just have fun and meet new people.
You never know!
Tip #5: Stay Fearless
GOOD THINGS WILL COME TO THOSE WHO WAIT.
I can tell you from experience that the most challenging part will be the “radio silence” from time to time.
It’s easy to become bitter and hopeless.
Guard your heart ferociously against these emotions!
They will kill any chance you might have for a happy relationship.
You need to remember…
It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon.
Keep your hope alive at every minute.
When hope starts to fade, return to step three, visualize your new love walking toward you and repeat.
It helps. I promise!
If you follow these steps, you will open the space for love. and in the process you will also sharpen your character, build your confidence, discover your wants and desires, and tighten your awareness.
Sounds like a win-win to me.
Now, go prepare yourself for love!