Today I want to talk about a very difficult subject.
This subject is particularly difficult for me to talk about because it is something that I have lived through.
Something I survived.
The thing that I want to talk about today is the that comes from abuse.
I want to share with you all this amazing truth:
There is a beautiful life waiting for you on the other side of this pain you might be feeling right now.
There is someone out there who will love you so much that all the cracks you have on your heart, will be to them, just beautiful reminders of how strong and resilient you really are.
Because let’s face it:
There are days when the pain is a lot to carry.
When you honestly feel like you are literally going to break apart into a million little pieces.
And the ones who are the ones who are supposed to love you, are the ones who end up hurting you the most.
When everything inside you wants to run
And that is how you learn to cover up the pain.
But that’s not how scars work.
They run deep.
So how do you go about living a life that appears to be normal when your life is an utter mess?
For most abuse victims, we get really good at pretending that everything is okay.
But the pain doesn’t stop.
I have found out the hard way that pretending just makes it worse.
When I was determined to “HIDE” my abuse, I was alone in every sense of the word.
I had nobody in my life that I could trust with my secret, so I carried the weight of it all by myself.
My husband just kept getting more and more cruel because there was never anyone who would question his actions.
I just suffered alone in silence…
So I thought!
But I was not the only one who was being affected by this abuse.
My children were also being hurt in ways that would forever change who and what they were.
It took the death of my sweet son to wake me up to this cold, hard truth.
CLEVELAND- Victor Leon Miera, you left us too soon. But now you can be the “wizard” you were always meant to be.
Victor was very special with his unique dreams and on Sept. 18, 2006, he decided to reach for the stars and move on to a new life.
Victor was born May 27, 1992 in Payson, Utah to Samuel Victor and Rebecca Campbell Miera.
Survived by his parents, Sam (Melanie) Miera, Cleveland; mother, Rebecca Campbell, Spanish Fork; four sisters and two brothers, Carmen and Anna Miera, both of Spanish Fork; Tyler, Mina, Russel and Sarah Miera, all of Cleveland; grandparents, Sam (Mary) Miera, of St. George,
and Julia Campbell, of Salt Lake City.
I had to lose a child before I was able to see just how damaged my entire family was because of the abuse.
Ironically it was that very thing that finally gave me the courage to speak the truth about my life.
To ask for help.
To finally realize that I was not alone.
By opening up and talking to other women, I found that there were a lot of people who have been living in silence just like I was.
I discovered that other people are broken too.
And They need someone to help.
Someone who knows what it feels like
Someone who has walked through it to.
The pain can scar you.
But if you let it, the pain can also change the way you look around the world.
The way you see yourself.
The way you look at other people.
Once I was finally able to speak openly about my abuse, I found that my scars were beginning to heal.
I discovered that nobody is too broken for grace.
Not even ME!
That’s what makes it GRACE!
It is a free gift that none of us earn or deserve.
It has the power to set things straight in your life.
It has the power to heal.
The power to transform.
I now know firsthand the power of community.
The blessings that can come from a friend who really cares.
And today, as we approach the holidays, I want to just let anyone out there who might need comfort know that you are NOT alone.
Take that first step outside of your comfort zone and speak to a stranger…
Or to that lady down the street or at work that you have been meaning to introduce yourself to.
Find a support group where you can let go of the pain in a supportive environment.
As I look back, I can see so clearly how it was the community that surrounded me during the time immediately following Victor’s suicide that allowed me to finally break free from the abuse, and start to live a life that was free.
A life where me and my children could begin the long and often difficult process of healing.
And as I sit here before you today, nine years later, I want to let you know that there is Hope.
There is love.
There is a beautiful life waiting for you to enjoy.